Hi everyone! Welcome, or welcome back, to The Teen Safe Zone where it's safe for teens to be themselves! In today's blog post, we will be discussing the feeling that you're missing out on your "golden years" or "golden hour" as the viral song likes to call it.
Before I reached my teen years, I always imagined them to be full of excitement and new experiences. I've gotten new experiences, but not exactly the ones I originally planned to have. The past three years have been far from perfect and each year has had its share of ups and downs... and I'm not sure if turning 13 during 2020 in the middle of a pandemic also played a huge part in it lol.
I periodically sit back and take a look at my life and realized that I have yet experienced the majority of the things I looked forward to in my teen years like late-night drives and hangouts with friends (most of my friends are long-distance), experiencing high school (I am in an online based school), and overall making life's greatest memories. I wanted to share my thoughts with you all because I know that there are plenty of other teens out there who can relate.
Romanticized Version Of Life:
Growing up and watching teen movies, reading books, and of course, social media has given us a romanticized version of life. You look forward to things like a glamorous Sweet 16 party, going to parties in general, having a bunch of friends, living life with no regrets, etc. However, this perspective of life sometimes doesn't always line up with reality. A lot of people instead struggle with things like anxiety, depression, toxic friendships, and more.
When you scroll on social media, read a teen book, or watch a teen movie, you usually don't see these things included. It can give you a rose-colored way of seeing life. It can feel very isolating when you see everyone around you, or in the movies, or on social media have seemingly perfect teen years and you don't. You may even wonder what are you doing wrong.
You may try to go to parties and instead have to struggle with social anxiety. Or you may try to put in your best efforts to make your dream friend group and instead have to deal with toxic friends. These are real experiences that people of every age group deal with. Just know that just because these things aren't shown in the media, doesn't mean that they won't happen and that other people don't experience them. You are not the only person your age struggling. The romanticized media is just for entertainment. Sure, you get can ideas from it, but you shouldn't base your entire teen experience on what the media says it should be.
Did You Know?
It is reported that about 42% of Gen Z struggle with some sort of mental illness; with anxiety being one of the highest-ranking of diagnoses.
As time is ticking and more days, months, and even years pass by, you start to wonder if you'll ever get to experience these moments and if you do, would it be too late? In today's society, we are conditioned to believe that your teen/college years are your 'peek' moments in life; that all of your best moments will mostly occur during this time in your life, and that you must "live for the thrill". However, this isn't the case for a lot of people and you shouldn't feel pressure to do so.
The Pandemic:
The pandemic also played a huge role in everyone's life. Although it was 3 years ago, the aftermath still affects many people; especially Gen Z. Everything we once considered normal went out the door when the pandemic came. People who attended traditional school were forced to do online school from home and it crushed Gen Z's way of communicating.
Being stuck at home with no outside communication made a lot of people get social anxiety when going out for the first time. There wasn't any more partying, hanging out with people in person, etc. After a few months, this became our "norm".
I am in an online-based school and have been attending since 2018 (long before the pandemic). I truly love the opportunities I am given in an online school, but it did have a huge effect on the way I socialize. I realized that I became more awkward in public and lost most of my communication skills. Because I am in an online school, most of my friends are long-distance. This makes it difficult to live "my golden years" as I intended because I always thought I would be in an in-person school where I could physically make friends. m
Many of you reading may also be in a case where something in your life is preventing you from living your "golden years" as you intended; most of it probably stemming from the pandemic. However, we shouldn't let that ruin our teen years.
Make Your Own Story:
It's completely ok if you don't get to live the typical "teen experience". Don't set yourself up for disappointment over something you don't have control over; especially if you're trying your best efforts to make things work and life just isn't having it. It's ok if you don't have that large friend group you might desire; having at least one good friend is better than having a group of toxic friends. It's ok if you aren't in the "dream teen relationship"; you have your entire life to find "the one". It's better to be single than to be stuck in an immature or toxic relationship.
The moral of the story is that it's ok if you don't have these things just yet. A delay in life doesn't mean "no". Sometimes a waiting season can be a blessing in disguise because it'll be at the right time for you, not whenever society says it is time. I understand how isolating it is waiting for the right friends to come along, or just waiting to actually live life and not just feel like you're fighting to survive. But just because we're in a waiting season, doesn't mean that there isn't something we can do in the moment.
Try using this time and make the best of it on your own. (If possible) take yourself on a mini road trip and have a good time on your own. Go outside and admire the sunset on your own. Try getting into healthy habits for your well-being as if these things have already happened. Don't sit around and throw yourself a pity party when there are so many things you have in life to enjoy now.
Make a goal this summer to finally be the main character and not label yourself as the side character. You're going to be the main character that has their own unique story; different from everyone else's main character story. Sure, you may not have the typical large friend group, popularity, relationships, finances, etc. But that's what makes your story stand out.
I take my story and experiences and write about them on my teen advice blog. My "main character" story consists of me finding my way in life while sharing advice I learn along the way with people my age. Find a hobby in the present time to help you cope such as journaling, painting, writing/making songs, etc. Remember, this is your story to live. You don't want to look back 20 years from now and regret your teen years.
Well, I hope you all enjoyed today's post! If you all have any other comments on this post, make sure to become a member on this site by simply signing up and making an account to comment! If you want to contact me about anything, please visit the "Contact Us" page on this blog where we can privately talk! Comment down below what your main character story is going to be about? New posts every Sunday! - Lexi
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I love the way you pointed out that every main character has their own unique story! <3 I hope that everyone reading this someday get to experience everything they hope for :)